Stage 1

So I'm totally siked the EP will be out in a few.  Still I thought I'd give you a peak into the beginning stages of my life as an artist.  See the Music tab and Download my First Mix CD...Ever!! Let's grow together and enjoy the ride!  AmandaHuntMusic.com

Emily Ferguson… This is Not a Blog!

Yesterday, I ate lunch with Emily Ferguson. She’s my good gal friend, complete with soft curly hair and a smile to match…. I had a blast!!

Somehow, between meetings and to do lists, we intentionally created a blissful picnic-complete with beach towels, sushi, Green & Blacks 70% dark chocolate and Swedish meatballs.  Authentically, we bounced life’s questions and revelations off each other. No judgment, just laughter. Then it hit me. It’s August…AUGUST…what on earth happened to January and April…JULY for that matter???

For years, I convinced myself my life would be best played out as a commodity investor. Sharp suits, competitive colleagues, lots of adoration and cold, hard CA$H!! Truth be told, the fear of poverty was driving me.

Now I’m “blogging”….as a songwriter….about a picnic, I’m enjoying with Emily…Thank God I’m not investing anymore.

I told Emily, if I had it my way, I’d be traveling and writing and singing and sharing myself with the world. Wisely she responds- in that sweet, gentle, matter of fact tone that one loves to hate- “You should travel and write a blog on your website.”

“WHAT”?!?! My inner diva shouts.

“Listen. Emily. It’s not that simple, m’kay. I can’t just start traveling…and….and…‘blogging’. I’m an adult. I have responsibilities. One needs a lot more money to travel and even more courage to blog. What will people think...hmm? What will people say…huh…have you thought about that?”

Before I could deliver my solid case to her, she offered me some more chocolate…*sigh*…. I Got Nothing.

So, welcome to my world, my expression; a clear place to respectfully share and grow in. It’s for you, it’s for me, it’s for the whole entire family…E.I.E.I.O.

But please for the love of all things precious and desired…RESPECT MY GANGSTA and do NOT call this a BLOG….Lol!!!

4AM…AGAIN?!?!

Several times last year, I'd roll over to a clock blaring 4:00am. This....occurrence started in '08, against my permission because I LOVE to sleep... I nap daily... trust me when I say...I wasn't waking me up!!

For the last 3 years- and without warning- when God wanted to speak, He'd choose to at this designated hour. Maybe I listen better at 4:00am.

Regardless, in this 3 years time, I'd have this plaguing notion. A nagging awareness or feeling, that I just began voicing to my husband.....in a whisper...in the dark...at 4am (so no one else knew my secret). The first time I said it out loud almost rendered me crippled from shock- "Honey", I'd slowly ration out in my best conspiracy tone..."this is not my life".

WHAT?!?! I must be delusional. When did my life, not become my life? And if it's not my life...whose is it?

Fast forward today- August 19, 2011 and you guessed it...I'm wide awake and it is 4 o'clock in the morning. I'm laying there in the dark....eyes wide open, staring at blackness and the question sweeps my mind. It's poised in a conversational tone, like "Something" or "Somebody" is talking to me (hint: Somebody is God's nickname). 

"So, who are you living for"?, He says.

“Who”? I reply… “WHO?? What do you mean. That's absurd- I'm Christian, who else. Christ of course...So why does life feel so small, and repressed, and ...limited.”

No response.

When I was 5yrs. old at the playground, Life was BIG! And more importantly, I was enjoying being 5... at the playground.  Now I'm 30, in my apartment, wishing I was 25 in Italy... Huh?!?!  This I gotta figure out… they tell me writing helps.

So that’s my mission- Journal the Journey. The tricky part is- I have a good life: great job in recession (check), warm family and friends (check), healthy body (check), a convertible (check), etc. (check). So it’s not that I don't like my life, I'm just not living it...Hmm.

Next month I turn 31... I suppose I should start.